It's that time again, where writers go hat in hand and apply for Creative New Zealand funding. Next Friday is the cut off date for the next round, and as usual I sit and stare at the application form and wonder why I bother. Why do I put myself through it all for the inevitable rejection? But then, hey, what have I got to lose?
There is a small upside to the constant rejection (besides it stopping Hubby asking when I'm going to make some real money until the next 'sorry' letter comes. Hope can be a good fend-off.)
The upside is this:
I have to get my act together.
I write a novel a year, so each time the Creative New Zealand closing date approaches I have to think up another new novel, because with the normal passage of time I am already writing the last project I submitted, regardless. I can't resubmit the same one, because it's already half written. This means I have to plan ahead, to write a synopsis and some sample chapters. It gets the next ball rolling so when I finish writing the current manuscript I've been toiling over, I don't have to then face a blank computer screen, and desperately think up ideas for the next one. It is already there, waiting for me.
So, although I sometimes think putting myself through the agony of applying and being rejected is madness, and pointless, it does have its uses.